relaxing, recovering...

This last week of my life apart from some drama was the greatest fun i've ever had in my life! I had met so many people and I was able to do so many things and become so many different people meaning here and there, and just being there...
I didn't get to see much of the festival itself but i had opportunities but I had so much to do that resting was all I had actually wanted to do.. I could not believe the wind that was taken out of me from that whole week of work.. I mean I loved it believe me I did, but I also loved drinking too... I was so glad to be given the opportunity to be apart of this thing, and even then the last night they honoured me or whatever, thanked me for helping them... it was so awesome I was just so happy to have been a part of it..
There was drama but when is there never drama? life is drama!
anyhow as for the weekend which was my birthday....well it was alright the greatest part was being with my family even though it was only for a VERY short time.. I felt so loved and appreciated and Im glad to be back in Vancouver.
the cool thing about working this last week is that I've made a lot of connections and lots of possible opportunties to work.. I mean lots of people heard the many long hours, long nights that I put for this event and so yeah some people got my name and number..and that's a good thing for me...because all the money I've spent this last week oh man alive I dont even know what happened to it..I was able to spend a little time with my new friend and Mentor a woman that everyone loves, everyone is inspired by her..and I got to chill with her and it was just wonderful.. Im really glad that I had made the decision to volunteer for this thing, and that I proved that I can do things on my own..
there were some moments that effected me in a bad way because there was so much going on, and Im trying to be a friend to everyone and anyone that comes my way, on top of still growing up..lol that's funny but what I mean by that is that I don't have much experience in friendships I mean I have many friends and people that have been there for over ten years..but to have made some friends this week and trying to be there for them and not let it be wierd..confused? well Im just saying I've got alot of friends but Im not sure I know how to be a friend.. I mean I have great qualities in being a friend but Im scared of conflict you know? not scared but confused when I have to deal with it because Im not the kind of person to put up with that kind of stuff. and this week apart from working with amazing people I've had my moments of frustration along with everyone there..lol.. but I didn't know how to make it alright you know? I had tried to act like it didn't happen because I couldn't stop my life all for the pains or thoughts of someone else..but I also had a hard time trying to figure it all out in my head about what Im supposed to do..so I found myself constantly asking people for help, and I had a lot of help alot of people cared for me this week.. that's the most amazing thing ever..and Im just really relieved that we got through this week and that everything turned out alright.

i brought my camera nearly everyday and guess what? i never had a moment to be able to take photos which was kinda sad because I wanted to do that..but I never was able to get around to it, because if I wasn't doing this I was doing something else... and I just hardly had time to do anything and even then i often found myself so busy I had forgotten to eat! no ones fault but my own but I'll be getting back into everything else..

I must say that my birthday was pretty good..I mean lots of people on Facebook wished me a happy birthday..one of my amazing friends a lady I had met the beginning of the week had taken me out..and that in itself was a very kind gesture.. i mean i wish that I would have been more happy and more alive..but I was exhausted, and I had someone I wanted to deal with but didn't know how..however even then being out with Molly it was awesome...she really is just an amazing woman that I am so glad to have in my life..I mean that's what it is about her is life.. she's so amazing it's hard to explain it but when Im hanging out with her I always can't help but smile, Im filled with joy when Im around her because she is a woman that does bring healing and does bring much life to those around her...and I am so glad that she came and celebrated my birthday with me...I really truly needed that time....

anyhow... now that last weeks all done...what do I do now? well apparently i'll be meeting with a writing therapist and if anyone knows what that is let me know..I have a job opportunity in Surrey Im just waiting to hear back from them... my friend is still probably wanting me to do overnights with her children... I may have some random opportunities to with different things and hope that it will all come together...
so at the moment I have no money what so ever..but Im hoping to see changes happening in this upcoming month.... Im hoping to make enough money that I can move out of my mother's house as much as I love being close to myfamily..I also need my space...

there isnt really anything new.. its just going to be a relaxing week for me because I have alot of rest and eating I need to catch up on...as well as timewith my family...

thanks for listenning

:)