I've given up so much for my work. I've done above all for anyone I care about.
The last 14 days of my life... no one has really shown up I mean they have but not lately. Been begging for food or snacks. Because I've been starving..
Idk
I'm in a relationship that is like no other. One that I've been willing to give up on my everything for.i dont know. In some ways they say they love me be there for me etc .but I still wake up without any messages. Go thro the day without any kind of anything.
I don't know If I want to keep this up. I don't know if I want to move forward an believe her when she said things would change she hasn't even changed in the 14 days I've been in hospital.
I'm getting surgery tomorrow. No idea if It's worth it. Alls i have is the word of a doctor. An I'm scared of that because I don't know what to expect.. my life is going to change in not a good way. And I'm scared what does that mean for me..
I'm going to have to go to a life I haven't lived in forever. An I'm not sure how it's going to work.
Idk
I'm losing my.mind and I'm scared of how it will be..and who will still be there by the end of it all
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