I feel alone...I feel like all the choices I've made in the past few years hasn't been good enough... you know being a parent. Really speaks to the kind of person I am. You see my kid... an you see a kind gentle handsome joyful kid. Reflection of how I've been with him.
But the stuff going on outside of our lives... simple things like having someone use his name to collect cheques an committing fraud.. an now I'm being screwed for it..
To some it may seem simple fix. To others it's like why do I need the supports... I'm a working mom. But expanses in our house hold... with ensuring we have food. Gas. An proper clothing..
These are expansive things... an I felt like I had to decide whst was best for him even if it meant I didn't get to buy a winter jacket or some warm socks.
I love my kid. I have no regrets about the choices I made to be a part of his life.
An in the beginning...I felt like...this...this is why I'm alive. This is why I was brought back from the edge of death.
Because I was meant for a greater purpose an it felt as though this was it. Not just being present in thr world. It was as though someone whomever seen the future an decided
Living is always a tough one... there so many difficult histories.
I just want a love that endures. One thst I can fill me with a happiness. .
I'm exhausted
I want to write but I csmt cause I'm absolutely exhausted
No comments:
Post a Comment