Procrastination

I can hardly describe the circumstances since I finished school it seems to have been a blur of things I was doing and not doing. As of this past Monday I have been completely distracted by some new youth here in Canada came to us from Greenland/Alaska they are so awesome and I really enjoy being around them and appreciate all the time I was able to spend with them.
I have been in a relationship for a month now... I must say it's all new and has taken some getting used to be able to share my life,my goals, and my future with... Lastnight my partner met my lady and I'm not sure of the expeience for either of them...

I am looking into Security Guard Training to help benefit my career choice and can only hope for the very best results on that one... I have been struggling to stay focused, it's been such great weather that I hardly realized how fast time had flew by... I am happy to say that even though I was very distracted in two days I was able to get all the paper work done and can only hope that it works out... I think it would be great on my resume and great for the big guns to see how much effort I've made to get where I am going.

The weather in Vancouver has been absolutely amazing, extraordinary and a little overwhelming but I've been pretty productive... Today was honestly the first day I rested, and I was able to get all my work done and I was able to be productive and just be right... Tomorrow will be another experience because I will be at the Pow-Wow in Squamish not normal for me but another job opportunity, something that will make my resume look good.. All this volunteer work, all the youth experience, and just being available to my friends...well it will pay off and I will get there!!

It's been confirmed as well... As of the 16 of July for the first time in a long time I am going to travel with my lady... we are going to head to Fort St.James and even as I say it my heart skips a beat... For the first time in years I have a strong desire to go to my father's grave site and hope to only have good energy and share stories of how great he was, and just honor him in that time... He was amazing, extraordinary... and when I think of how far I've come in a year... I know he is looking down on me being proud of the woman I am becoming!
I'm planning on finding the money, and time to go and create a new grave thing it's not stone it's just wood well I want to make a new one and bring it to his site and just honor him.. A few weeks ago I seen a picture of my father's grave and it was ok sad moment, but i realized his wood thing that has his name and birth/death its falling apart so it's my desire to head up there to bring him a new one... I'm undecided if I want to see my dad's family but as time continues on I will see how it goes...and I know my heart/soul will make the right decision from there...

For one of the first of many times in my life...I am looking back at this year of my life... How far I've come... how clear minded I am...and how much I am determined that no matter what happens I will survive,and I will get there... I think that's what I like about hanging out with these youth is that they keep that side of me inspired... they have no idea how fantastic they are and how much it means to me to be a part of their lives...
Unfortunately the downfall is that I won't be going on Tribal Journey's this year.. With all this creation of secuity guard training, and taking care of myself... well I just have too much to do and no time to get away... I hope that once I'm certain my rent is paid, and that I am secure for the training while Tribal Journeys will be the first place I attend.
I miss it.. Even being around the youth as they go out in the Canoe my heart skips a beat and I realize how much I miss it... I hope that it works out but if not I realize now how much Tribal Journey's means to me and I have to plan for it next year...

Well I just wanted to touch base it's been a long time since I wrote in my journal and even as I write I am so surprised to hear myself say everything is going good, and I am moving forward in my life... I am accomplishing everything in my life and I am mving forward... I am proud of myself...

Thanks for listenning :)